How Could This Happen To Me
by Emily-Sage
Summary: One game, One Night, and One drunk driver can change a person whole life in seconds. Clary's family is changed dramatically when her family is in a car crash. Can Jace be able to save this messed-up teen?
1. How Could This Happen To Me

"I am just taking Clary to Jonathan's game I will be back in an about an hour" Jocelyn told her husband giving a kiss on the cheek.

"Just be careful there is a storm coming" Luke warned.

"Luke" Jocelyn laughed shaking her head.

"Bye dad" Clary stopped at her dad's side and kissed his cheek then rushing out to there car. Jocelyn gave one last wave and stepped out into the outdoors as a light drizzle came down.

**1 hour later**

"_The Eye of the Tiger  
the Eye of the Tiger__**" **_Clary, Jonathan and Jocelyn burst out laughing as they sung the last note.

"We are horrible singers" Jonathan commented.

"Just think we can be on broadway, the Fairchilds Live" Jocelyn said.

_I open my eyes  
I try to see  
But I'm blinded by the white light  
I can't remember how  
I can't remember why  
I'm lying here tonight_

"This is such a depressing song" Jocelyn reached her hand to turn the channel. Lights flashed in front. Jocelyn gripped the stirring wheel. The screeching of tires the loudness of the horn.

_And I can't stand the pain  
And I can't make it go away  
No I can't stand the pain _

The sickening crush as the two cars meet. Screaming as Jonathan's bones break. Metallic smell as blood pours everywhere. Then nothing but silence.

_How could this happen to me  
I've made my mistakes  
Got no where to run  
The night goes on  
As I'm fading away  
I'm sick of this life  
I just wanna scream _

How could this happen to me

Lightning flashed across the sky as thunder rolled. The rain washing the blood away. Clary lay motionless on the cold ground. Making no sound. Sirens being heard in the distance.

"Honey can you hear me" A unfamilar voice asked.

"Mom is she" Another voice similar to the first said.

"No I can feel her pulse" The voice whispered.

_Everybody's screaming  
I try to make a sound  
But no one hears me  
I'm slipping off the edge  
I'm hanging by a thread  
I wanna start this over again_

**Jace's POV**

"Dad can we please go now" I asked. It was boring sitting in a hospital waiting for my dad to finish his rounds.

"Yes let me grab my stuff" Robert Lightwood replied. He was walking away when his beeper went off. He looked down at it.

"Jace stay put I have to do this" he yelled. Turning to the nurses behind him he yelled "Nurse get stretcher and paddles quick." He ran to the door and waited.

"Dad what is it" Jace asked.

"Car crash, drunk driver two dead two in serious condition." His dad replied. Jace cringed hearing something related to death. Robert stepped aside as a stretcher wheeled in. There was a girl maybe a year younger than him. She had bright fiery red hair. There was blood covering her a paramedic's hand stuck in the side of her abdomen blood soaking his hand.

"No breathing or pulse get paddles" Robert yelled to the nurse. The nurse handed him the paddles.

"Charging 200" The nurse yelled. The girl jumped as the paddles struck her.

"Charging 400" the nurse yelled again. Robert put the paddles to her chest. All this happening in front of my eyes.

"AGAIN" Robert yelled.

"Charging 600" The nurse cringed.

"PULSE" The paramedic yelled. They wheeled the girl to the surgery room. Two more ambulances arrived. Three more people being wheeled in all covered in blood. Then two people were seen walking behind them. I recognized one of them.

"MAIA, over here" I yelled at the girl. Maia whipped her head around and came over.

"It was so horrible Jace" Maia cried sitting down.

"What happened" Jace asked.

"Well me and my mom were driving after the game we were maybe a few yards away from Clary's car. That's when we saw them get hit in the passengers side by another car. We stopped our car putting on hazard lights. I called 911 while my mom went to see if she could see anything. Somehow Clary" I cut her off.

"Who's Clary" I asked

"She's one of the cheerleaders but she hangs out with us nerds like Simon, Me, Magnus and Ray-Ray" Maia explained. "She sometimes hangs with Izzy"

"Oh, okay continue" I replied.

"Anyways somehow Clary got thrown out of the car my mom tried to get her to respond but she just lay motionless. She had a glass piece right on her side. Then the paramedics arrived. She got lifted away and I went with her told them I was a friend. But then" her voice cracked "When we got maybe seconds away from the hospital her heart stopped" Maia sobbed harder.

"She was my best friend" She cried.

"She's all right I saw them bring her back" I tried to calm her.

"Jonathans dead" She said looking me in the eye.

_Jonathan is dead_. My eyes widened. Jonathan and I were close to best friends. I never knew he had a sister. We never really hung out after school. He sat by us at lunch. One my best friends is dead. And that's when I let the tears fall.

_So I try to hold onto a time  
When nothing mattered  
And I can't explain what happened  
And I can't erase the things that I've done  
No I can't... _

How could this happen to me  
I've made my mistakes  
Got no where to run  
The night goes on  
As I'm fading away  
I'm sick of this life  
I just wanna scream

How could this happen to me

**A/N This is my first fan-fic so please go easy on me. I hoped you liked the first chapter. Song used was Untitled By Simple Plan you should go see the music video. You know how you can make my day, REVIEW PLEASE. :)**


	2. Light Up

**Clary's POV**

I groaned feeling every part of my body ache. I could feel the needles in my skin. Hear the steady rhythm of my heart. I opened one eye and was met by a golden boy walking into the room, coffee in hand. I quickly squeezed my eyes. Questions swarmed in my head. Obviously I was in a hospital. I knew what hospital was but then I couldn't answer some easy questions.

_What's my name?_

_Why am I here?_

_Is the golden boy related to me?_

_What happened?_

"I can tell you're awake" The boy said breaking me out of my daze. I shyly opened my eyes and looked him in the eye.

"Who are you" I asked hoping not to know him.

"I am Jace. Your brother's friend." He replied.

"Do you um know my uh name" I blushed furiously. He chuckled.

"Your name is Clarrisa Fairchild but everybody calls you Clary you were just in a car crash" He said. I froze. Memories came down on me.

"_The eye of the tiger" We all sung and laughed not knowing what was to come._

_The screeching tires. Metallic Air. Jonathan's screams as the bones snapped._

I started hyperventilating. Sobs erupting from my throat as tears wouldn't stop coming. The heart monitor went crazy as my heart pounded in my chest. My whole body shook. Jace looked shocked for a second but he snapped out of it and came to my side. He sat by me on the bed and put his arms around me.

"It's okay it's over" He soothed. The heart monitor wouldn't shut up and soon nurses rushed in. One of them came at me with a needle. I clung to Jace trying to stop. She put it into my skin. A few seconds later I felt dizzy and I collapsed into a heap in Jace's arms.

**Jace's POV**

**The nurse scolded me telling me I told her too much at once and never to do it again. I looked down at Clary. Her face still had tears on her cheeks. I wiped them away. She still looks beautiful. I put her on the bed and shook my head. I just met her for crying out loud. There was a knock at the door bringing me out of my thoughts. I walked over to the door and opened it.**

"**Hi ya" Izzy greeted dragging Simon into the room.**

"**Sorry she tagged along" Alec grumbled. I stepped aside letting them in.**

"**Why are you here anyways, I know you didn't know Clary" Izzy put her hands on her hips.**

"**Jonathan was her brother and since you know he's gone I am going to take care of Clary like if she was my sister" **

"**Aw that's sweet" Izzy gasped. "I am your real sister and you don't even treat me like that!"**

"**That's because your not nice like she is, plus she just was in a car crash" I stated. Izzy glared at me.**

"**I **_**AM**_** nice just not to you" She flipped her hair and went to Clary's bedside. She patted her head and held her hand.**

"**Hey Clare it's me Izzy" Izzy said softly.**

**Clary's eyes fluttered open.**

"**Izzy?"Clary whispered.**

"**Yeah it's me"**

"**God I feel like I got hit by a ton of bricks. Plus I feel like I have a bad hangover" Clary grumbled rubbing her forehead. Izzy laughed.**

"**Since when did you drink" She asked.**

"**Since they gave me all these killer medicines I swear it could be drugs" Clary said.**

"**It **_**is **_**drugs you idiot. Just medical drugs" Simon laughed.**

"**Simon!" Clary reached out her hands like a baby.**

"**Hey Clary" Simon said giving her a hug. I had to admit I was kind of jealous.**

"**Where's my mom" Clary asked. **

"**Well you see your mom" I elbowed Simon in the gut.**

"**Your mom is getting some rest she's fine" **_**for now.**_** I lied. Clary nodded. Izzy and Clary talked some more. Then they started talking about some girly stuff. Simon and I looked at each other.**

"**Well I will just leave you two to um talk" I shot Simon a look and we dashed out the door.**

Clary's POV

"That so worked" Izzy laughed. I joined in shortly after.

"Just everytime we need them to go away just start talking about periods" I laughed.

"such a great idea" She sighed "We are geniuses"

"Where is Jon" I said hoping she will tell the truth unlike Jace. She opened her mouth to say something.

"Don't you dare lie to me Izzy" I warned. She looked at me silently.

"Can you handle the truth" She whispered. My eyes went wide. I covered my mouth holding in the sobs.

"Please tell me he's here" I asked. "Just tell me he is still hanging by a thread."

Izzy looked up to me. "He's not hurting anymore. He's not hanging by a thread." Her eyes filled with tears. "And he's watching over you" I let out a sob but quickly covered it hoping that the nurse won't come in and put me to sleep again. I calmed down and looked up at Izzy.

"My mom?" I asked barley able to. Izzy looked away.

"She's still alive" She played with her fingers.

"How bad Izzy" I asked losing hope.

"Coma" She whispered.

**Jace's POV**

**I walked past an old hospital room. It had a nothing in it except a big grand piano. I looked around seeing if anybody was here. I went and sat at the piano. I pushed a few keys to see if it was still working. All the notes were perfect. I got ready and started playing "Run" By Snow Patrol.**

_I'll sing it one last time for you  
Then we really have to go  
You've been the only thing that's right  
In all I've done_

_And I can barely look at you_  
_But every single time I do_  
_I know we'll make it anywhere_  
_Away from here_

**I heard a girl's voice start singing with me. **_**(A/N: Bold: Girl Italic: Jace Italic and Bold: Both)**_

**Light up, light up  
As if you have a choice  
Even if you cannot hear my ****voice  
I'll be right beside you dear**_To think I might not see those eyes  
Makes it so hard not to cry  
And as we say our long goodbye  
I nearly do_  
_  
__**Light up, light up  
As if you have a choice  
Even if you cannot hear my voice  
I'll be right beside you dear**_

**_Louder louder_**  
**_And we'll run for our lives_**  
**_I can hardly speak I understand_**  
**_Why you can't raise your voice to say_**

**_Louder louder_**  
**_And we'll run for our lives_**  
**_I can hardly speak I understand_**  
**_Why you can't raise your voice to say_**

**Slower slower  
We don't have time for that  
All I want is to find an easier way  
To get out of our little heads**

_**Light up, light up  
As if you have a choice  
Even if you cannot hear my voice**_  
_I'll be right beside you dear..._

"**Izzy told me about Jonathan and my mom" She kissed me on the cheek. "Thanks for trying to protect me" She waved bye and left without another word.**

_**A/N: Thanks all who reviewed. Please tell me if you want Simon to end up with Maia or Izzy your choice. I promise NOT EVERY chapter will have a song in it but I have decided to name my chapter titles after songs or lyrics. Song used for today: Run by Snow Patrol. Hope you all enjoyed this story do far. You know what makes me happy: REVIEWS! :)**_


	3. A Million Raindrops

Clary's POV

"I am so not going to miss this place" I said grabbing my purse and phone.

"Want to go visit your mom for a while?" Izzy asked. I nodded my head and we headed up to the **ICU**. Izzy stayed back in the lobby.

"I will be waiting for you" She gave an encouraging nod pushing me forward. I quietly entered my mom's room. A nurse was standing over her giving her medicine.

"15 minutes" She said then left. I walked over to my mom's bedside.

"Hi mom it's me Clary." I said softy. "Well I am finally out of the hospital with just some minor scaring and bruises." I took in a deep breath.

"I miss you mom I want you back home" I started crying. She said nothing just looked like she was sleeping. I shook my head. "This is crazy she can't hear me" I sighed. Her arm twitched. I gasped and paged a nurse.

"What's wrong sweetie" the nurse said coming in.

"She moved!" I yelled.

"Honey that's normal it's just a reflex of the body she is not going to wake up because of that" She gave me an apologetic smile. My face fell and I trudged out to the lobby.

"I wanna go home Izzy" I said wiping my eyes. She gave me a smile and took my hand.

"My brothers are taking you home I don't have my license" She led me to a dark blue BMW. I opened the door and slid in the backseat Izzy behind me.

"How is she" Izzy asked softly.

"She looks like she sleeping. I just want to yell at her to wake up but I know she won't. I saw her move but the nurse said it's just a reflex. I'm scared Izzy, scared she won't wake up" I sniffled and wiped away the stray tears. Izzy hugged me tight.

"Shh it's okay I will be with you every step of the way" I looked down at my lap and fiddled with my hands.

"Is this it?" Izzy's older brother Alec asked. I nodded my head looking at our two story tan brick house. I stepped out of the car grabbing my bags. I headed up the path then turned around. I waved as the car drove off. But not after I saw a golden head in the passenger's seat. I shook my head and walked inside. All the lights were off and no sound could be heard. I looked at the clock 4:00.

"Dad?" I asked hesitantly.

"In here baby" He called back. I walked towards the voice. I ended up at mom's art studio. I opened the door. Luke was sitting on her chair and admiring all her paintings. I sat by him on my stool.

"She really is amazing" Luke sighed. I nodded my head and hugged Luke.

"I miss her already" I sighed.

"She'll be back before we now it" he kissed the top of my head and walked out of the room. "I will be in the living room making plans for Jocelyn's paint shop.

"Dad!" I called. He turned around. "Can I take over while she is gone I can open it right after school then come home to make dinner please?" He looked hesitant then sighed.

"Fine but right after school got it?" I nodded my head and sprinted up the stairs.

"LOVE YOU DAD" I shouted before going into my room. I set my alarm clock, tomorrow I was going to school. I felt as though I could rule the world. Everything was going to get better, mom was going to wake up, I get a job that I love, and I will get to hang with Izzy more. Life was okay and I was going to get through it. I pulled the covers up to my head and fell into a deep sleep. I woke up at 5:00 sweating from a nightmare. Imagines filled my head. I opened the window and climbed down the big oak. I walked down the street past Taki's and to the park.

**Jace's POV**

"**Wow she's messed up" I laughed. Izzy shot me glares from the back seat. "What, I didn't mean it in a bad way"**

"**Dude she just lost her brother plus her mom is in coma" Alec pointed out. I shrugged.**

"**So who wants to go to Takis" I smiled.**

"**NO I am cooking d-"**

"**I AM IN" Alec said almost jumping out of his seat. Izzy crossed her arms and pouted. **

"**You guys are mean. My cooking is not **_**that **_**bad"**

"**Um Iz have you tried it" I put in. She kicked my chair while I laughed.**

**We got to Taki's when the sun was just setting. It was only about 5:00 still the sun goes down to early in the winter. We sat down and ordered. Alec and Izzy talked randomly. Bored I stared out the window. All I saw was a red head walking toward the park that's all it took to stand up form my seat and grab my coat.**

"**I will be back" I said.**

"**Jace where are you going" Izzy asked.**

"**To the park there's something I have to do" I slipped out the door and followed the red head down the streets. It started drizzling. The water making the side walks dark. I hid behind a tree as I watched Clary. The rain started pouring. Clary threw her head back and turned in the rain. All I knew was she looked pretty dancing in the rain.**

Clary's POV

I let the tears fall as I twirled around. Forgetting everything. I laughed remembering the time me and Jonathan danced in the rain.

_Flashback:_

"_I hate rain" 11 year old me groaned. "I had dance today but I don't want to walk in the rain." I crossed my arms and pouted._

"_Why you pouting" 12 year old Jonathan said poking my face._

"_I don't want to walk in the rain" I repeated. Jonathan shrugged and picked me up throwing me over his shoulder._

"_JONATHAN PUT ME DOWN" I shouted. He shook his head and ran outside with me. He put me down then bowed._

"_Would you honor me with a dance Clarrisa" he held out his hand._

"_I am getting soaked!" I whined. He rolled his eyes putting his arms on my waist. I slowly put my arms on his shoulders. We did the waltz then pranced across the lawn. I threw my head back and laughed. He stopped and leaned closer._

"_If we run we can still make it to your dance class. I nodded my head and we raced hand in hand down the sidewalk to the dance studio._

"_Thanks big bro I won't be afraid to get wet anymore" I saluted him and marched in the building not caring if I was soaking wet._

_(End of flashback)_

I fell to the ground and sighed. He was gone and not coming back. My brother, my sibling. So much for ruling the world. I stood up and turned around coming face to face with a blond.

"Hey Clary" He said.

"Jace?" I asked. His hair was wet and clung to his head. Beads of rain going down his face. The rain came to a stop and he held out his hand.

"Lets get you home" He said. I nodded and leaned on him feeling all my energy gone. Jace noticed this and in one swift movement took me up in his arms.

"Jace" I said surprised.

"Just sleep Clary you need it." Was all he said before I fell into a blissful sleep in his arms.

_**A/N: I want to thank all you guys for reviewing I never thought it would be this popular. So sorry for not updating in a while. Okay sorry to Im-A-fAlLeN because the majority of people said Simon and Izzy but I hope that won't stop you from reading this. I got five reviews last chapter lets see if I can get 6 reviews this chapter (Fingers crossed.) The song used for today is A Million Raindrops By: Bebo Norman. REVIEW PRETTY PLEASE!**_


	4. Thinking Of You

I woke up in the comforts of my bed. I sat up quickly and looked around. A single note lay on my nightstand.

_Dear Clary_

_I didn't have the heart to wake you up so I brought you to your room. Don't worry your dad didn't see me and I used your key I didn't break in or anything. Hope you're not mad at me. :)_

_Jace_

٭٭٭٭٭٭٭٭

I closed my locker and held my books to my chest. It was 5th hour one more till lunch.

"OH MY GOD HAVE YOU HEARD" Izzy shouted behind me. I gasped dropping all my books.

"God Izzy don't do that" I bent down and retrieved my books.

"Now what's so important that you had to give me a heart attack?" I asked.

"Well the fact that homecoming is on Friday that means only 3 days!" Izzy shouted.

"Okay" I drawled out "I am not going"

"Really" a voice said behind me. Izzy gasped and stared behind me her eyes wide. I slowly turned around.

"Sebastian" I whispered. Sebastian was the captain of the soccer team, star of the football team and the most popular boy in school. He also was my brother's best friend and he was always came over to my house.

"Hey Clare-Bear are you sure your not going to homecoming" He said.

"Um well I am not sure and I don't have a date or dress" I blushed.

"I can easily get you a dress" Izzy piped up.

"Then it's just the date matter. Clare do you want to go to homecoming with me?" Sebastian asked.

"S-sure" I smiled blushing furiously. He smiled and kissed me on the cheek.

"Talk to you at lunch" and he left. Izzy looked at me.

"We have to find you a dress" She gasped. I rolled my eyes.

"It's just a dress Isabelle" I said.

"You. Just. Broke. The girl code!" Izzy covered her heart and put a hand to her forehead.

"There's a girl code?" I asked.

"Like, didn't you know" Jace said in a preppy girls voice coming beside me. I jumped slightly and dropped my books.

"Jeez stop sneaking up on me. I swear my books are going to be wreaked by the end of the day" I sighed and picked up my books, Jace helping.

"So we on for lunch?" He asked handing me the last of my books.

"Nope she can't. She is sitting with hottie-mc-hotstuff" Izzy said in a sing-song voice.

"Izzy!" I snapped at her. I hit her lightly in the side. She shrugged looking back at Jace. He had an amused expression playing on his face.

"Now don't talk about your brother like that Izzy" he smirked. My insides melted. I shook away the feeling.

"It's not" I started.

"It's with Sebastian" Izzy cut me off. I blushed and looked down.

"Well I am still sitting with you" Jace shrugged. I snapped my head over to him.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Sebastian _is _my friend" Jacestated "I am the co-captain for the soccer team" I blushed and shrugged. I walked to English parting with Jace and Izzy half way. I sat at my desk. Miss. K started her lecture. Romeo and Juliet.

"_Romeo and Juliet_belongs to a tradition of tragic romances stretching back to antiquity. Its plot is based on an Italian tale, translated into verse as The Tragical history of Romeusand Juliet bu Arthur Brooke in 1562 and retold in prose in Palace of Pleasure by William Painter in 1582. Shakespeare borrowed heavily from both but, to expand the plot, developed supporting characters, particularly Mercutioand Paris. Believed written between 1591 and 1595, the play was first published in a quarto version in 1597. This text was of poor quality, and later editions corrected it, bringing it more in line with Shakespeare's original.

Shakespeare's use of dramatic structure…." I pretty much zoned out at that point. Stareing out the window hoping for the lunch bell to ring.

٭٭٭٭٭٭٭٭

I walked into the cafeteria, kids buzzing around happily. I got my lunch tray heading toward the back where I always sat.

"Now where do you think your going" Sebastian whisperedinto my ear. He slid a arm around my waist and turned me around. "Don't you want to sit with me?" He asked. I shook my head yes and blushed.

"thanks" I stuttered. He smiled and sat me down. He was on my right and Cyrus on my left. Out of the corner of my eye Jace was smirking at us.

"You know your beautiful when you blush" Sebastian said in my ear. I cracked a smile still looking down at my food. The bell rang. We all got up and walked to our lockers. Sebastian follow me to mine. I looked up to him and gasped. He was staring straight at me. I blushed as he leaned closer. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he did the same to my waist. Are lips met. Shivers raced down my back. I was enjoying it but I couldn't stop thinking about Jace. Wondering how it would feel to have him wrap his arms around me. Hold me passionately. tell me I am beautiful. Have our lips together. I hugged Sebastian tighter trying to erase Jace from my mind.

**A/N: SORRY I haven't updating in a while I had a major writers block, ( It didn't helpo the fact I didn't get many reviews :(, but don'****t worry I will stay optimistic.) Also i am going to apologize for this being so short. The song today was (drum roll please) Thinking of You by Katy Perry. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE and…. PLEASE Review. As you can see I am very desperate. ;) Love your guys reviews. **

**Question of the day: Who is you favorite mortal instruments character?**


	5. Pale

I fixed up my dress and put on last minute adjustments.

"Here I come Angel High" I sighed putting on my heels. Izzy stepped out of the bathroom. My mouth dropped open. Izzy had a black dress that wasn't even passed her knees a bow wrapped around her torso. The purple heels and purple bracelet adding color. A beautiful black necklace hung from her neck.

"You look amazing" I gasped. She smiled.

"Not bad yourself Clary" I looked down at myself. I was in a dark green dress just passed my knees. The black lace over it and a light green silk ribbon around the torso accenting it. Black heels giving me some height. We walked arm in arm as we glided down the stairs. Jace, Aline, Sebastian, and Simon were all waiting for us. Simon took Izzy's arm and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. My dad came out of no where with a camera.

"Okay smash together now" Luke said holding the camera in front of him. After about 20 pictures I held up my hand.

"No more dad" I laughed.

"Well when your mom wakes up she will want to see these" He stated. I cringed and forced a smile.

"We will be leaving now" I said dragging Sebastian out the door. We piled in the back of the limo. Jace and Aline sat across Sebastian and I. Izzy and Simon were off to the side.

"Too us" Jace said raising the glass of wine.

"To us" I murmured as the glasses clanked. My mind was somewhere else though. My dad said if my mom wakes up. What if she never wakes up?

"You okay?" Sebastian whispered in my ear. I nodded my head. Taking a deep breathe we arrived at the school. Sebastian led me through the doors. The theme was an enchanted garden. White and black streamers hung everywhere. Tea lights hung from the streamers. Flowers were placed everywhere. In the middle of the floor was a big fountain.

"It's beautiful" Izzy breathed.

_**The world seems not the same,  
though I know nothing has changed.  
It's all my state of mind,  
I can't leave it all behind.  
Have to stand up to be stronger.**_

"May I have this dance?" Sebastian asked. He bowed and held out his hand. I giggled and put my hand in his.

_**Have to try to break free  
From the thoughts in my mind.  
Use the time that I have,  
I can't say goodbye,  
Have to make it right.  
Have to fight, cause I know  
In the end it's worthwhile,  
That the pain that I feel slowly fades away.  
It will be alright.**_

We swayed back and forth. I kept counting in my head. I spun me around and dipped me back. I laughed. Then as cliché as it sounds our eyes met on the dip. He froze and looked deeper into my eyes.

_**I know, should realize  
Time is precious, it is worthwhile.  
Despite how I feel inside,  
Have to trust it'll be all right.  
Have to stand up to be stronger.**_

Sebastian leaned in our lips brushed.

_**I have to try to break free  
From the thoughts in my mind.  
Use the time that I have,  
I can't say goodbye,  
Have to make it right.  
Have to fight, cause I know  
In the end it's worthwhile,  
That the pain that I feel slowly fades away.  
It will be all right**_

I pulled myself closer. Are lips molded together. It was as if it was our first kiss. Fireworks as people discribed it. I closed my eyes and nothing was around us. A flash of gold was there as I closed my eyes. I squeezed my eyes tighter to try to get him out of my head.

_**Oh, this night is too long.  
Have no strength to go on.  
No more pain, I'm floating away.  
Through the mist see the face  
Of an angel, who calls my name.  
I remember you're the reason I have to stay**_

We pulled apart but he held me against his chest as we resumed dancing. A tap on my shoulder interrupted us.

"Can I talk to her for a second?" Jace asked Sebastian. I looked into Sebastian's eyes. He looked down at me and nodded.

"Go I will go get a table for us." Hesitantly I put my hand in Jace's. He put a hand on my hip and one in my hand. I did the same but put my other hand on his shoulder. We moved to the beat. Jace slowly turning me around.

_**Have to try to break free  
From the thoughts in my mind.  
Use the time that I have,  
I can't say goodbye,  
Have to make it right.  
Have to fight, cause I know  
In the end it's worthwhile,  
That the pain that I feel slowly fades away.  
It will be alright.**_

"Clary, I want you to be careful" Jace said breaking the silence.

"What?" I asked.

"Sebastian is older than you, I don't want you to get hurt" He said. I stared at him in shock.

"_Your_ not the boss of me" I stated.

"Dammit Clary, just listen to me." Jace whispered yelled.

"Why do you care" I turned my head away.

"I lost you once Clary I am not going through that again" I pushed him back.

"I barley know you" I said.

"I saw you cry, I feel your pain. I am your friend Clary" His eyes filled with hurt.

"WHY, do you care so much" This argument shouldn't hurt this much.

"I CARE about you, that's what friends are for"

"FRIENDS DON"T CARE THIS MUCH" I yelled then jogged back to Sebastian.

Sebastian was sipping his drink. "Let's dance" I said and gripped his hand. He twirled me around and we swayed back and forth.

_Friends don't care that much. He shouldn't have cared so much. How can he have lost me if I was barley around. I wish John was around he would help me, he would have danced with me. I never saw him in a tux that would have been interesting._

"Go" Sebastian said breaking me out of my thoughts.

"What?" I asked confused.

"you care about him to. Go after him" I stared at him amazed. "Now!" He gave me a little push. I looked back at him.

"thank you" I ran up to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek "Thank you" then I was off to find Jace.

**A/N: SORRY SORRY SORRY (x10) I'M AM SO SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN A WHILE. Now that that is through I want to thank all my reviewers. When Jace said he had already lost Clary he was referring to the first chappy when he saw her die then come back. Hope you enjoyed this, please review. PLEASE! ;) (Almost forgot, the song used was Pale by Within Temptation)**


	6. Good Enough

I ran through the crowd desperately looking for Izzy or Jace. Izzy and Simon were laughing at a joke when I saw them. I pushed my way over to them.

"Have you guys seen Jace?" I panted. Izzy looked at me confused.  
"He left like 5 minutes ago said he wasn't feeling good" She answered.

"Do you know where he went?" I asked.

"He likes the park or maybe our house" She replied. I nodded my head and sprinted out the door. I made my way to the park. Out of breath I put my hands on my knees. Seeing the fountain I stopped and sat down. Looking around I looked for signs of Jace. It was deserted only the light post making flickering noises could be heard. The wind blew my way. I got drenched in the fountains water. I groaned and took off again. My feet started hurting so I took off my heels. Running barefoot felt weird I had to admit. Arriving at the there house I knocked on the door. A boy older than me opened it. Alec it was I think.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"I'm Clary remember? Anyways I am here for Jace I need to talk to him" I pleaded.

"Why are you wet" Alec said scanning my body. I blushed and looked down.

"It's a long story anyways I _really _need to find Jace"

"Down the hall to the left his door has the name on it" I thanked him and walked down the hall. His door was white with just the letters J.A.C.E. Without knocking I flung the door open.

"What do you want Alec" He said not taking his eyes off the soccer ball that was being flung up and down. I blushed and couldn't help but stare at his bare chest. Shaking my head I took a deep breath. I walked to his bed side. His head jerked up.

"_Clary? _What are you doing here" He demanded. I kneeled by his bed side and put my head in my arms.  
"I'm sorry" I squeaked. It seemed like eternity before he spoke.

"Why are you here Clary" Jace asked.

"I wanted to apologize, I was a jerk and, and" I flung my arms around his body. "I'm sorry." He wrapped his hands around me.

"It's okay no big deal" I looked up at him. My breath caught into my throat. Jace was stroking my hair and looking deeply into my eyes. It was like his eyes hypnotized me.

"Clary" Jace said breaking me out of my daze. "Why are you wet" I blushed.

"The fountain kinda got me wet" I replied. He let out a chuckle and laid back down. I took a peek at his alarm clock. 1:30 am it glowed.

"Can I stay here" I asked hesitantly.

"Sure' He said "Just make sure you call Luke or he'll have Sebastian's head" I nodded my head and picked up my phone.

"Luke its Clary" I said once he picked up.

"Yeah Clary what is it you need me to pick you up" He asked.

"Um I was wandering if I could stay at Izzy's" I answered.

"Are you sober?"

"Dad! Of course I am" I gasped.

"Okay just remember our "talk" Kay kido" He added.

"Ew dad I am just hanging with Izzy nobody else" I said in disbelief.

"Okay good night"

"Good night dad" I sighed and hung up. Jace walked over to his dresser and pulled out a tee-shirt and shorts. He threw it at me and pointed to the door.

"Over there's the bathroom." He stated then walked back over to his bed. I walked into the bathroom. It plain white. Regular is how I would describe it. I took off my clothes and turned on the water. Rinsing off my body I hummed a little song. I wrapped the towel around my body and looked into the mirror. I changed into his clothes. Walking out I blushed. Jace was sitting on his bed his eyes closed. Silently I walked over to his side. Peering over him I looked at his face. He looked like a child, cute.

"Didn't your mom say staring is bad" Jace asked opening one of his eyes. I crossed my arms and looked away.  
"Well you looked normal and peaceful it was weird" I shot back. He chuckled and pulled me down to his side.

"Izzy's going to Simons, looks like your sleeping in here" Jace whispered in my ear.

"Why can't I sleep in Izzy's room" I asked.

"She locks it" He shrugged. I gaped at him. Who _locks_ there bedroom door?

"I'll sleep on the couch." I nodded my head.

"My parents will see and Izzy's not here to cover for you" he replied.

"You _really _want to get me in bed with you Jace don't you" I gasped and covered my mouth at how that sounded. An amused smirk played on his lips. He rolled on top of me and pinned me down.

"Sure I guess you could put it that way. I prefer less clothing though I might say" he smirked. I blushed and tried to turn my head. Quick as lighting he brought his hand to my chin making me look at him.

"Look me in the eye Clary" he whispered. I gulped and stared into his golden orbs. I stared speechless.  
**(Fluff starts here)** Slowly he leaned down. Our lips met. I closed my eyes savoring the soft feeling. He ran his tongue on my bottom lip asking for excess. I gladly gave in and my tongue searched his mouth. Memorizing everything. He removed his hands from my arms and put them on my waist. One snaked its way up my shirt playing with my belly. I broke free and panted for air.

"Amazing" He whispered against my lips. I smiled slightly and kissed him again. I moved my hips slightly making him give a little moan. Getting a little turned on by this I wrapped my leg and brought him closer. Again I rocked my hips against his.

"God Clary" He whispered. He raised my shirt over my head. I threw my head back as he nuzzled my stomach and flicked his tongue at my belly button. He ran his hands up my sides lightly brushing across my chest. Then it hit me.

"J-Jace I am" I stuttered finally coming back to my senses. "I am not ready" I blushed. He looked me into my eyes, lust filled his and love. He nodded and brought my shirt back over my head. I laid by his side and curled into his chest. Jace kissed my forehead.  
"Goodnight Clary"

**A/N: Okay don't kill me I am not good at fluff. But I hope that was okay. Song used... Good Enough By Evanescence. I am trying to pick out a variety of music so yeah anyways. I know it was a little short but I hope the fluff made up for that. I want to thank all my fast reviewers you guys made my day. Really cause I am stuck at my house because of a stupid blizzard. Please review more Love to hear what you think. :)**


	7. Fearless

**_A/N: Before you start I would like to say there are a few curse words here so if your sensitive then I dont' know anyways ENJOY!_**

_I Throw My Hands Up In The Air Sometimes,  
Saying Ay-Oh, Gotta Let go.  
I wanna celebrate and live my life,  
Saying Ay-Oh, Baby Let's Go.  
Cause we gon rock this club,  
We gon' go all night,  
We gon' light it up,  
Like it's dynamite._

I groaned and reached for my phone. I flipped it open.

"hello?" I yawned.

"Sorry to wake you up this early" The voice said. I glanced at the clock 7:30. "Is this Ms. Fairchild or Mr. Fairchild?" the voice asked.

"Um yeah it's Clary Fairchild." I said back.

"My name is Mrs. Jansen, I am calling to inform you that you are to attend court for the hearing of Mr. Morgenstern, the one who hit your car" I gasped and shot out of Jace's arms.  
"WHAT!" I yelled. Jace reached his arms out to me.  
"Clary go back to bed it's to early" He murmured still have asleep. Why did that name sound so familiar.

"W-why do I have to go" I asked.

Mrs. Jansen sighed on the other end. " Because you're the only one who _can _and is able to testify. Honey he was drunk that means he committed murder it means he killed your brother"

"When is this" I asked softly.

"We can talk it over with some food. Can you meet me down at star bucks now?" She asked.

"Now is fine I will be right there" I got off of the bed and looked for my jeans.

"Shit" I groaned all I had was my prom dress. I walked over to Izzy's room. I knocked on the door. When nobody answered I swung it open. It came open easily. I strode over to the closet and fished out a shirt. I found a shirt relatively my size and a skirt that was small enough for me.

"She locks it my ass" I grumbled walking back over to Jaces room. Jace was up and rubbing his eyes when I walked in.  
"Morning Clary" He said.

"Bastard" I shot back. I walked around his bed. The leg stuck out and I stubbed my toe.

"Shit" I yelled and looked down. A little blood was coming out "Dammit" I groaned in frustration. Jace chuckled and raised an eyebrow.

"Clarrisa if you haven't noticed we don't use such language in this house" He teased.  
"Shut up ass"

"Okay tell Jacey what's wrong" Jace said. I glared at him.

"Well I stubbed my toe,had to wake up at 7:00 when I had a late night and some ass tells me his sisters door is locked and I have to sleep with him. Now tell me Jace is your sisters door really locked" He ran his eyes on my body.

"Considering those are Izzysclothes I am guessingits no use lying now. Nope Izzy never locks her door." Jace struggedhis eyes having a evil glint in them.

"Ass. I am out of here" I gathered the last of my stuff and stuffed it into my bag.

"Oh come on Clary" Jace gathered me into his arms and held me tight. "Don't be like that" He said.

" I really have to go" I said. I tried to avoid eye contact but he already caught me.

"Hey why are you crying" He turned me around and wiped a few tears away. Just looking at him made me break down.

"Shh it's okay" Jace tighten his arms around me and held me close. "Is this about the phone call you got this morning?" He asked. Slowly I nodded my head.

"Tell me what happened" He asked. I shook my head and grabbed his hand.

"Just follow me" I said. We walked into star bucks hand in hand.

"Why are we getting coffee? I hate coffee" Jace stated.

"Be quiet" I hissed. I looked around for Mrs. Jenson then I realized I had no idea what Mrs. Jenson looked liked. I put my hand in my pocket looking for my cell phone. As I was about to call her a women around her 20's came over to us.

"Are you Ms. Fairchild?" The women asked.

"Mrs. Jenson" I asked.

"Hi Clary, I am Mrs. Jenson here why don't we have a seat" She looked over to Jace. "Is he your boyfriend" She asked.

"Yes"

"No"

"Clary"  
"Jace" I groaned. "Okay well it's a longstory my dad hasn't approved it yet so were not dating _yet"_I said. Mrs. Jenson nodded understandingly. Jace looked at me like I had three heads. I shot him a glare and sat down across from Mrs. Jenson.

"I still don't know why we are here" Jace whispered into my ear "I call what almost happened last night more than friends" I blushed and looked down at my hands.

"So Ms. Fairchild will you do it" She asked.

"Yes I will but I don't know if my dad will let me" I shrugged.

"Okay well here is my card call me anytime. Oh and the court date is December 31st sorry if you have plans but that is the only time we can do it" I nodded.

"Wait court?" Jace gasped. I jabbed my elbow lightly in his ribs.

"Yes for the person who hit the Fairchild's car didn't you know this" Mrs. Jenson asked.

I shrugged "I didn't think he was really that important to tell" He shot me a glare. "Yep it's payback from last night" He rolled his eyes but didn't say anything else.

"I just had a question though" I said hesitantly.

"Can I know the first name of the person or maybe a picture" I asked.

"Oh sure its" She was rummaging in her bag when my phone cut her off.

_Don't pick up dad is calling_

_He is going to talk on and on._

_"_Oh it's my dad calling I need to pick this up" I blushed.

"Hello" I asked.

"Clary thank god," Luke took a breath.

"Is something wrong" I asked.  
"No it's the opposite Clary you need to get down to the hospital your mom has woken up" Luke said. My eyes widened and I smiled.

"I will be there in like less then 10" I yelled.

"Clary you have to listen first "I snapped the phone shut not hearing what he said.

"I am sorry I HAVE to go" I grabbed Jace's hand.  
"My moms woken up" I shouted in glee. He chuckled and hailed a taxi. I shot into the taxi seat grabbing Jace's hand I instructed the taxi driver to go to the hospital. My mom was waking up I get to see her. I couldn't contain my smile as we made our way to the hospital.

**A/N: Yay finished! Hope you enjoyed it. I want to thank all who reviewed very appreciated. Song used was Fearless by TaylorSwift. In the beginning though was Dynamite-Taio Cruz. Please review!1 :)**


	8. Everytime

I stepped out of the taxi and ran to the hospital doors leaving Jace to pay for the taxi ride.

"Hi Clary" The nurse smiled from behind the desk.

"Hi Ms. Kim" I nodded and ran up the stairs. When I got to my moms door I saw Mr. Francisco my mom's doctor talking to Luke.

"Can I see her?" I asked jumping up and down.

"Clary you should know something first" Luke sighed.

"Yeah what is it" I thought for a second "Wait, don't tell me her face looks deformed and you don't want me to freak out" I smiled.

"I wish it was that simple hon." The doctor sighed.

"What is it you're making me nervous?"

"Clary sweetie your mom doesn't know you, she has memory deformalities" The doctor said.

"He's lying right dad?" I asked looking at Luke with pleading eyes.

"He's not Clare bear" Luke pulled me in for a hug.

"So she doesn't remember me or anything?" I asked my voice breaking.

"No, but we have explained it and she said she'll be open to anything" Luke said.

"If you bring some pictures it might make her remember her memories" Mr. Francisco said.

"I will bring some tomorrow" I sighed sadly. The doctor nodded. "Can I still see her" I asked. Luke nodded and stepped away. I opened the door my breath catching in my throat. She was wide awake looking down at her hands.

"Mommy?" I sobbed. Jocelyn looked up and gasped.

"You look like me" She took a breath "Are you my daughter?"

"Yeah mommy it's me Clary" She looked into my eyes. Green striking green.

"Clary" She said the name like it was the first time. "How can I forget my own daughter!" She cried putting her head in her hands.

I ran over to her bed side "It's not your fault mom" I tried to reason with her. She hugged me tighter chanting over and over.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry" She cried.

"It's alright I love you" I said. She looked up into my eyes tears filling hers.

"Come sit with your mommy" She paused "Like old times" I nodded and cuddled up to her side.

"Tell me a story about you and my family" she said. I looked up to her surprised.

"Are you sure?" I asked. Jocelyn nodded her head. I took a breath and started telling my story.

"It was Christmas. I was about 7 and Jonathan my brother and your son was 8; we stayed up all night waiting for Santa. Around 2:00am we heard a noise coming from the living room. We snuck up behind the couch and waited. We surprised when we found dad and you sitting cuddled up by the lights. Just like a movie, John said" I swallowed tears and continued. "You were talking in whispers when Luke pointed to a present and said "Open that one it will be our secret" You looked curious and moved towards it. Slowly you unwrapped it as if it was the most delicate thing in the world. When you opened it you found" I looked up to my mom. She had tears in her eyes.

"A single little seashell locket." She chuckled "Luke made it himself with glue and two shells" I nodded my head.

"You put a picture of all of us then of Luke, John and me in a dog pile on the other side" I reminded her. "You used to always wear it" She smiled lightly.

"It's lost in the crash isn't it" She stated.

I nodded my head and curled closer to her. She stroked my hair lightly.

"Go to sleep Clary" She whispered.

"I'm not tired" I shot back yawning. She chuckled and kissed my forehead.

"Even if I don't remember ever loving you, I love you with all my heart right now" She whispered.

"I love you with twice as much as my heart" I said as my eyes drifted closed.

"Always" I heard her whisper before I drifted into a blissful sleep.

**Don't kill me don't kill me PLEASE! I KNOW it's really short but I have been super busy with student council, school, sports, and friends. But how about I make it up to you if you are the first, fifth or tenth to review you will get exclusive to the last chapter. I hope that makes up for a little. I promise I will work on this as much as possible. Please still review even if it sucks. Song used was Every time by Brittany Spears. Oh I forgot to mention the dresses for the dance are on my profile so check it out! :)**


	9. When I'm Gone Like Toy Soldiers

I got to the school when the bell rang. I ran to my class just as the late bell rang. The teacher gave me a sympathetic glance and wrote down attendance.

"Okay everybody get out your text books and turn to page 128 start…" The teacher was cut off by the intercom.

"Ms. Fairchild come to the office please" Our principle Mrs. Karol said. The teacher nodded and I walked out of the classroom. Turning around the corner I made my way to the office.

"Ah Ms. Fairchild nice to see you" Mrs. Karol greeted as I walked through the door.

"You needed to see me"

"Yes well these last few weeks have been traumatic for you I just want you to know if you need to talk to me I am here" She said.

"Yes I know" I nodded.

"Also I am having a before Christmas break assembly I would like you to talk on behave of your brother" she said "If it's alright with you"

I smiled "It's alright" she nodded.

"Okay you can go back." I was reaching for the door when she called out again.

"I would love to see you in the talent show. A certain blond told me you have a great voice." Mrs. Karol winked. I blushed and nodded.

"I will be in it"

"Bye Clary" Mrs. Karol said with a light laugh.

"Bye Mrs. Karol" I said walking down the hall. I was half way to my class when I felt arms wrapped around my waist and hands cover my eyes.

"Guess who" The boy breathed in my ear.

"Umm Santa Claus" I shrugged.

"Guess again" he whispered.

"Hmm Idk is he tall golden hair golden eyes um what's his name Dace, Ace, Nate?" I said acting dumb.

"First of all who says Idk anymore and Dace, Ace, Nate? It's Jace you dumb ass" He chuckled.

"Really? I don't think I know a Jace" I said. He turned me around and kissed me on the neck.

"Still don't recognize me?' He asked.

I laughed and shook my head. "What are you doing out here anyways?"

He held up a piece of paper "hall pass" He grinned. I rolled my eyes.

"You're in the bathroom a long time" I said.

"What are you doing here" he asked ignoring my comment.

'Weren't you listening to the intercom I had to go to the office?"

He grinned again "Oh Clary in troubleeeee" he sang.

"You are so immature sometimes no I got called to speak in the assembly" I said.

His smile vanished and he pouted.

"Speaking of office you told!" I shouted.

"Told what?" he looked confused.

"About me singing now she expects me to sing"

"YAY! Clary's going to sing for me" He sang.

"I swear your another person what happened to the cool lay back person I know" I asked.

"Izzy gave me lucky charms this morning" He showed off his teeth.

"I swear she put crack in it" I rolled my eyes then pointed to the door "Get back to class"

"Fine mother" He pouted but smiled and swept me up into a kiss.

"See you at the assembly" he whispered in my ear sending shivers down my spine. He left and I was in a daze as I walked back to class.

****٭٭٭****

My hands were clammy as Jace came me once last squeeze on the hand as he went back to his seat. I went on to the stage off to the corner as our student council president said her last words.

"And now Clarrisa Fairchild as some words to share" The crowd clapped as I walked to the podium. The spotlight was on me as I searched the crowd. Jace gave me a wink and smile while Simon and Izzy gave me thumbs up.

"As you know a month ago I was in a car crash. I lost somebody you people may have known" I cringed as I said the past tense. "His name was Jonathan Fairchild, my brother" Some people whooped and some nodded there heads. "You may also know he was a great friend and brother. It's also going to be the first Christmas without him." I took a breath.

"Jonathan was like any other brother. Funny, annoying, and most of all I hated his guts" I got chuckles from the crowd.

"That was before we matured. Around my 10th birthday we became closer. We have a different relationship than other siblings because he was my best friend." I wiped my eyes and continued. "We were together most of the time, when I went on my first roller coaster, when I went to my first haunted house, and even when my first boyfriend broke up with me" I laughed "Lets just say that boyfriend hasn't talk to me because of my brother" The crowd laughed. I saw Jace smile and nod.

"People say and I quote "I hate my brother or my brother is so annoying." I used to agree to that but things change….. Drastically" I sighed. "I just want to remind no not remind command you guys to do something over Christmas break something that I can't do anymore" I sighed and let the tears fall freely. "I want you to go celebrate Christmas with your family and give them all big hugs. Tell them you love them a million times" I paused. "Because literally you may wake up one day and there just gone and you didn't say I love you once" Everybody in the crowd knew what I was talking about I saw tears now coming to peoples eyes. "I have never said I love you to John but now I am saying and I know he is listening. I love you Jonathan forever and always" I said. The school stood up and clapped hollering and whistling. I went over to the principle.

"Thank you Clary I think you made a real difference on how people are going to spend Christmas" she came me a hug and handed me a folded up gift. I slowly opened it and let out a sob as I held the jersey to my face. It smelled slightly of him.

"We put up his football jersey in remembrance of him but I thought you might want his soccer jersey" I smiled and nodded through my tears.

"Thank you Mrs." I said. She gave me one last squeeze as my friends came over. They engulfed me in a group hug and tears fell down my face.

"YOU"LL NEVER BE ALONE CLARRISA" Jace yelled over dramatically.

Izzy rolled her eyes. "What he means is we talked to your dad and for Christmas break you'll spend it at my house well until Christmas of course" I smiled and hugged them tighter.

"Thank you so much"

"Hey that's what friends are for." Simon shrugged.

"And boyfriends" Jace piped up. I rolled my eyes.

"We haven't talked to my dad yet remember?" I laughed. Jace grumbled but kissed me on my forehead wrapping his arms around me.

"Picture!" Izzy cried as she handed the camera to a class mate" We all goofed off as Jace planted a kiss on my head as the flash of the camera went off. It was indeed going to be a good Christmas, even without John.

**A/N: Srry I haven't updated it's been slow but I and a big social studies project but I guess you don't want to hear excuses. The song used was When I am Gone by Eminem I was also thinking of Like Toy Soldiers by Eminem so any of them I love **

**Eminem. Here's the lyrics please look up the songs there great! Review please! :) **

**When I am gone:**

Have you ever loved someone so much, you'd give an arm for?  
Not the expression, no, literally give an arm for?  
When they know they're your heart  
And you know you were their armour  
And you will destroy anyone who would try to harm 'her  
But what happens when karma, turns right around and bites you?  
And everything you stand for, turns on you, despite you?  
What happens when you become the main source of her pain?  
"Daddy look what I made", Dad's gotta go catch a plane  
"Daddy where's Mommy? I can't find Mommy where is she?"  
I don't know go play Hailie, baby, your Daddy's busy  
Daddy's writing a song, this song ain't gonna write itself  
I'll give you one underdog then you gotta swing by yourself  
Then turn right around in that song and tell her you love her  
And put hands on her mother, who's a spitting image of her  
That's Slim Shady, yeah baby, Slim Shady's crazy  
Shady made me, but tonight Shady's rocka-by-baby...

[Chorus]  
And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn  
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice  
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling  
And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain  
Just smile back  
And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn  
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice  
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling  
And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain  
Just smile back...

[Verse 2]  
I keep having this dream, I'm pushin' Hailie on the swing  
She keeps screaming, she don't want me to sing  
"You're making Mommy cry, why? Why is Mommy crying?"  
Baby, Daddy ain't leaving no more, "Daddy you're lying  
"You always say that, you always say this is the last time  
"But you ain't leaving no more, Daddy you're mine"  
She's piling boxes in front of the door trying to block it  
"Daddy please, Daddy don't leave, Daddy - no stop it!"  
Goes in her pocket, pulls out a tiny necklace locket  
It's got a picture, "this'll keep you safe Daddy, take it withcha'"  
I look up, it's just me standing in the mirror  
These fuckin' walls must be talking, cuz man I can hear 'em  
They're saying "You've got one more chance to do right" - and it's tonight  
Now go out there and show that you love 'em before it's too late  
And just as I go to walk out of my bedroom door  
It's turns to a stage, they're gone, and this spotlight is on  
And I'm singing...

[Chorus]  
And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn  
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice  
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling  
And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain  
Just smile back  
And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn  
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice  
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling  
And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain  
Just smile back...

[Verse 3]  
Sixty thousand people, all jumping out their seat  
The curtain closes, they're throwing roses at my feet  
I take a bow and thank you all for coming out  
They're screaming so loud, I take one last look at the crowd  
I glance down, I don't believe what I'm seeing  
"Daddy it's me, help Mommy, her wrists are bleeding,"  
But baby we're in Sweden, how did you get to Sweden?  
"I followed you Daddy, you told me that you weren't leavin'  
"You lied to me Dad, and now you make Mommy sad  
"And I bought you this coin, it says 'Number One Dad'  
"That's all I wanted, I just want to give you this coin  
"I get the point - fine, me and Mommy are going"  
But baby wait, "it's too late Dad, you made the choice  
"Now go out there and show 'em that you love 'em more than us"  
That's what they want, they want you Marshall, they keep.. screamin' your name  
It's no wonder you can't go to sleep, just take another pill  
Yeah, I bet you you will. You rap about it, yeah, word, k-keep it real  
I hear applause, all this time I couldn't see  
How could it be, that the curtain is closing on me  
I turn around, find a gun on the ground, cock it  
Put it to my brain and scream "die Shady" and pop it  
The sky darkens, my life flashes, the plane that I was supposed to be on crashes and burns to ashes  
That's when I wake up, alarm clock's ringin', there's birds singin'  
It's Spring and Hailie's outside swinging, I walk right up to Kim and kiss her  
Tell her I miss her, Hailie just smiles and winks at her little sister  
Almost as if to say..

[Chorus/Outro]  
And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn  
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice  
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling  
And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain  
Just smile back  
And when I'm gone, just carry on, don't mourn  
Rejoice every time you hear the sound of my voice  
Just know that I'm looking down on you smiling  
And I didn't feel a thing, So baby don't feel no pain  
Just smile back...

**Like Toy Soldiers:**

[Chorus]  
Step by step, heart to heart, left right left  
We all fall down like toy soldiers  
Bit by bit, torn apart, we never win  
But the battle wages on for toy soldiers

[Verse 1]  
I'm supposed to be the soldier who never blows his composure  
Even though I hold the weight of the whole world on my shoulders  
I am never supposed to show it, my crew ain't supposed to know it  
Even if it means goin' toe to toe with a Benzino it don't matter  
I'd never drag them in battles that I can't handle unless I absolutely have to  
I'm supposed to set an example  
I need to be the leader, my crew looks for me to guide 'em  
If some shit ever just pop off, I'm supposed to be beside 'em  
Now the Ja shit i tried to squash it, it was too late to stop it  
There's a certain line you just don't cross and he crossed it  
I heard him say Hailie's name on a song and I just lost it  
It was crazy, this shit way beyond some Jay-z and Nas shit  
And even though the battle was won, I feel like we lost it  
I spent too much energy on it, honestly I'm exhausted  
And I'm so caught in it I almost feel I'm the one who caused it  
This ain't what I'm in hip-hop for, it's not why I got in it  
That was never my object for someone to get killed  
Why would I wanna destroy something I helped build  
It wasn't my intentions, my intentions was good  
I went through my whole career without ever mentionin' ...  
Now it's just out of respect for not runnin' my mouth  
And talkin' about something that I knew nothing about  
Plus Dre told me stay out, this just wasn't my beef  
So I did, I just fell back, watched and gritted my teeth  
While he's all over t.v. down talkin' a man who literally saved my life  
Like fuck it i understand this is business  
And this shit just isn't none of my business  
But still knowin' this shit could pop off at any minute cuz

[Chorus]

[Verse 2]  
There used to be a time when you could just say a rhyme  
And wouldn't have to worry about one of your people dyin'  
But now it's elevated cuz once you put someone's kids in it  
The shit gets escalated, it ain't just words no more is it?  
It's a different ball game, callin' names and you ain't just rappin'  
We actually tried to stop the 50 and Ja beef from happenin'  
Me and Dre had sat with him, kicked it and had a chat with him  
And asked him not to start it he wasn't gonna go after him  
Until Ja started yappin' in magazines how he stabbed him  
Fuck it 50 smash 'em, mash 'em and let him have it  
Meanwhile my attention is pullin' in other directions  
Some receptionist at The Source who answers phones at his desk  
Has an erection for me and thinks that I'll be his ressurection  
Tries to blow the dust off his mic and make a new record  
But now he's fucked the game up cuz one of the ways I came up  
Was through that publication the same one that made me famous  
Now the owner of it has got a grudge against me for nothin'  
Well fuck it, that motherfucker can get it too, fuck him then  
But I'm so busy being pissed off I don't stop to think  
That we just inherited 50's beef with Murder Inc.  
And he's inherited mine which is fine ain't like either of us mind  
We still have soldiers that's on the front line  
That's willing to die for us as soon as we give the orders  
Never to extort us, strictly to show they support us  
We'll maybe shout 'em out in a rap or up in a chorus  
To show them we love 'em back and let 'em know how important it is  
To have Runion Avenue Soldiers up in our corners  
Their loyalty to us is worth more than any award is  
But I ain't tryna have none of my people hurt and murdered  
It ain't worth it I can't think of a perfecter way to word it  
Then to just say that I love ya'll too much to see the virdict  
I'll walk away from it all before I let it go any further  
But don't get it twisted, it's not a plea that I'm coppin'  
I'm just willin' to be the bigger man  
If ya'll can quit poppin' off at your jaws well then I can,  
Cuz frankly I'm sick of talkin'  
I'm not gonna let someone elses coffin rest on my conscience cuz


	10. Perfect

I sighed and turned around and round with my bag on the floor. I inhaled the sent of the Lightwoods house. Fresh, new, good. Jace, Alec and Sebastian all ran around me and raced up the stairs to get the Christmas tree. Apparently they were procrastinators and wanted to set up the Christmas tree later. Us girls dragged up ourselves to the kitchen and made cookies while the boys set up the Christmas tree. We all made hot coca and brought it out for them while the cookies were baking. We all then got around the tree and hung up ornaments. Jace occasionally reaching around me to put on an ornament or sneaking glances my way. Finally someone spoke up.

"Okay nobody let Clary try to put up the tree topper" Sebastian teased. I pouted and crossed my arms over my chest. Arms came around my legs and I was lifted onto Jace's shoulders.

"There now somebody gives Clary the star" Jace said. Izzy handed me the star. I reached over his head and placed the topper on the tree head.

"Can you reach it" Jace chuckled.

"Might I remind you I can choke you with my legs" To emphases my threat I lightly wrapped my legs around his neck.

"Kinky Clary" Izzy chuckled. I gasped and suddenly I was falling. I gasped as my back fell onto something soft. Laughs erupted from around me as I pouted at Jace.

"That wasn't nice" Max said coming down the stairs. He ran over to my side and I smirked at Jace.

"You tell him Max" I smiled at the boy.

"Clary can I talk to you" Alec asked suddenly. Slowly I nodded my head. I mean this boy barely talked to me and now suddenly he wants to talk alone.

I walked up the stairs and went into a vacant room. He closed the door and his cheeks heated up red.

"Um so your kinda the one that I trust with this kind of stuff I mean if Izzy knew she would blow her top and Jace well might be awkward." I raised my hand up.

"Just get to the point Alec" I asked.

"I think I am gay" He said. I paused and my mouth flew open.

"You _think"_ I pointed out. "I mean I am honored that I am the first one you told but how do you not know"

"I just don't know Clary" Alec said defeated. I put a finger to my chin and tapped it lightly. Then an idea popped into my head.

Quickly I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him on the lips. At first he didn't do anything then he kissed back. I pushed away breathless.

"Feel anything?" I asked.

"Clary-?" Jace asked from the door way. I looked toward him and then realized how bad this looked. Me, a boy (his best friend) wrapped in each other arms in a room alone and out of breath.

"Jace I swear it isn't what it looks like" I held up his hand and rolled his eyes.

"Like I haven't heard that before" And he quickly left. I unwrapped myself and sat heavily on the bed.

"What am I going to do?" I asked.

"Go after him" Alec said in the "duh" tone. I swiftly got off of my bottom and went for the door.

"Oh and Clary" I paused and turned around.

"I didn't feel anything, I am gay" He said. I smiled and hugged him quickly and left to find Jace.

I found him in his room. He was tossing a ball up and down. I sighed and sat heavily on his bed. After a long silence he finally spoke up.

"So you and Alec huh." He asked.

"we don't like each other" I stated.

"Then why did you kiss him" He asked. I shrugged and looked down.

"Dammit why Clary just so you can play with my feelings" He looked down at me his golden eyes blazing.

"I can't tell you! I promised!" I said. He sat up and closed in the door.

"Fine then I guess I will see you" He said. I stared at him in disbelief and caved.

"Don't' tell anybody do you understand me!" I finally yelled.

"Fine what's so important that Alec would tell you and not me" he asked.

"He thought he was gay so I tested that theory by kissing him" I whispered. Jace shot up like a bullet.

"What did he say?"

"He didn't feel a thing, he's gay" Jace came over to me and embraced me into a strong hold.

"I am so sorry" He whispered.

"It's okay I am alright" I rolled my eyes. Surprising me he planted a passionate kiss on my lips. I deepened it making him moan.

"I love you Clary, Merry Christmas" He whispered trailing kisses on my jaw.

"And I love you Jace Lightwood, Happy Holidays" he chuckled. Slowly he lowered me down to the bed. Coldness hit me as he took off my clothes. Then as he wrapped me again in his arms we were warm once again.

**Yeah yeah I know your furious with me for not updating in a like a month. I have decided this story is coming to an end and only has two chappys left which I already typed. So thanks to who ever reviewed and LOVE ALL MY FANS! The song used was F***ing Perfect By Pink. I don't know why I chose it I just like that song. Anyways Chapter 11 will be up after this one! :D Sorry again. PLEASE REVIEW!**


	11. Leave Out All The Rest

December 31:

All eyes were on me as I stepped into the court room. People talked in hushed whispers. I blushed and looked down at my feet. Jace tugged on my arm to keep me moving. My mom and dad took a seat behind us as Jace sat by my side. I fiddled with my hands as Mrs. Jenson explained what was going to happen.

"My god" I heard Luke whisper as the crowd went silent. I turned in my seat as I saw who walked in. My firkin' real dad valentine who my mom divorced.

"It was YOU! You bastard you killed Jonathan on purpose." I yelled. He looked amused.

"I did no such thing I was on high influence." Valentine shrugged.

"You and I both know you can take high amounts of drugs without an effect" I growled.

"Is that how you see it dear Clarrisa" Valentine winked and made his way to his seat.

"Do you know him Clary" Mrs. Jenson asked.

"He is my real dad" I growled.

"Well, that may help a lot" Mrs. Jenson smiled. I looked at her confused and opened my mouth to speak but stopped when the judge came in.

"Please rise" A person said. I followed everybody else as a young middle aged woman strode down the middle and into the seat. She hit the hammer thing.

"Mr. Morgenstern to the stand" (A/n: I don't know a lot about what happens at court trials.)

Mrs. Jenson stepped up to the stand. "Mr. Morgenstern can you explain to me about what you did before you crashed into the van"

"Oh yes I was at the bar drinking with a few buddies from work and I guess I had to much"

"So you admit that you were indeed under the influence" Mrs. Jenson asked.

"Yes, I was very drunk and could hardly remember my name" he said.

"In that case this case would be solved EXCEPT for the fact you are related to the Fairchild family" There were a few gasp in the crowd.

"Yes I am Clarrisa and Jonathan's real dad" More gasped and I fidgeted in my seat. Jace noticed this and reached under the table giving me a light squeeze.

"So would it be possible that you weren't under the influence and was so mad at you ex family that you tried to murder them" Mrs. Jenson stated. It went silent as the words went through the crowd's heads. Suddenly there were gasp and shouting behind me.

"Order" The judge said putting down her hammer. "I said ORDER" It went silent. The judge nodded at Mrs. Jenson to continue.

"Tell me why Mr. Morgenstern why would you hate your family so much you would try to kill them"

"I didn't it was just a convenience that I was the one that hit there car."

"Was it also a convenience that you came out without a single mark?"

"Yes your exactly right" Mrs. Jenson studied him for a second before saying.

"I am done here Clarrisa can you come up here" I nodded and made my way over. Mrs. Jenson nodded at me encourage then started.

"Ms. Fairchild can you explain the events that happened before the crash."

"Well Jonathan had a basketball came to determine if they were going to nationals" I took a breath. "After the game we all got in the van and took off to home." I looked at valentine and saw him smirking. "We were all singing and then a sad song came on so mom took her eyes off the road for a second. The car filled with bright lights and that's all I remember" I sighed.

"Are you sure that's all you remember" I thought back to the night. "I remember hearing screaming" I looked off into the back of the court room as images filled my head. "I smelled blood and heard the crushing of bones as John snapped in half" I cried. Gasped were heard again and some crying.

"Ms. Fairchild you don't have to go back to that time I meant do you remember anything about seeing Mr. Morgenstern." Mrs. Jenson looked at me slightly pale and sad. I shook me head.

"Okay let's go back" Mrs. Jenson said. "Can you tell me any reason why Mr. Morgenstern would hurt your family?"

"Well beside the fact that my mom divorced him no I can't" I thought for a moment. "there was this one time Valentine got mad at me and hit me. Then John stuck up for me"

"When was that" She asked.

"About I was 13 I think. It was the year Valentine left" I said.

"I think its time for a 10 minute recess" Mrs. Jenson said.

"10 minute recess" The judge hammered. I sighed and went out to the hall and got a drink. Arms wrapped around my waist.

"Hey" He whispered in my ear. I smiled and turned hugging him.

"Aww is this another one of your whores Clarrisa. Darn what happened to the nerdy one, get tired of him" I turned and glared at Valentine.

"I don't have _any _whores" I hissed. "And is name was Simon he was my best friend still is"

"Somebody's touchy" He taunted. The bell rang and I made my way back to the court room. Everybody got in place as an idea popped in my head. I whispered it in Mrs. Jenson ears and her grin got huge.

"I would like to call Clarrisa to the stand" Mrs. Jenson smirked. I smiled big and walked up to the stand in a better mood.

"Now tell me did Mr. Morgenstern do anything to you or your brother" she said.

"He beat us" I shrugged. The crowd gasped at my answer.

"LIAR!" Valentine shouted jumping from his seat.

"ORDER, Sit down Mr. Morgenstern now!" The judge said authority seeping through her voice.

"When did this happen" Mrs. Jenson asked.

"When ever he got or should I say tried to get drunk" I paused. "You see my dad can take a lot of alcohol without him getting wacko. If he was in pain he would drink to try to erase everything but since he could take it he beat us instead"

"What made Mr. Morgenstern leave?" Mrs. Jenson asked.

"Well John was sick of him hurting me so he told mom and mom threatened to tell the police unless he left" I smiled at my mom. She had a soft look in her eyes and gave a weak smile back.

"Okay that is enough evidence for now" The judge said rubbing her temples. "Verdict proved guilty of child abuse and murder"

I ran my way over to my mom.

"He's gone finally out of our lives!" I shouted.

"Lets go home it is New Years Eve" Jace whispered in my ear. I looked up to my parents.

"Go have fun kido you deserve it" Luke said. I grinned and took off to Jace's car.

"Be safe!" My mom called after us.

We all sat in a circle. Simon, Izzy, Alec, Sebastian, Jace, Me, even Church. We all had "Welcome 2011 hats" and passing around a truth or dare card.

"Izzy, truth or dare" Jace asked.

"Well I already did truth two times so dare" She smiled.

"I dare you to make out with Simon for 1:00 minute straight" He grinned. She looked at him shocked her mouth falling to the ground.

"Is that all really I thought you could do better than that" Izzy laughed. "Time it" Izzy said as she climbed onto a red-faced Simons lap. I pulled out my phone and timed it.

"GO!" Jace shouted. Alec quickly left the room saying he wanted a drink while I was laughing my but off. They were locked till my beeper went off. Izzy got off of Simon and went to find Alec. Simon blushed and looked down.

"Aww is Simon flustered" I cooed.

"Shut up Clary" He murmured then went up to go to the bathroom.

"Sebastian, truth or dare" Clary asked.

"Um dare?"

"I dare you to lick to wall" I giggled.

"Really Clary that's all you got" He rolled his eyes and licked the wall.

"Now I am going to round up the gang the balls about to drop"

"Sebastian!" I gasped pretending to look disgusted.

"What" he thought for a moment "Oh gross Clary. Ew that's not what I meant your not so innocent" I giggled. "Come on church this is no environment for you" He said as he left the room.

"So it's just us" I said after a long silence.

"Yep so truth or dare" he asked.

"Um dare?" I asked unsure. Jace leaned into my face.

"Kiss me" He breathed onto my face. I smirked and leaned in. Our lips touched as his hands moved onto my waist. I crawled onto his lap still interlocked. I wrapped my legs around his waist to get a better hold. His tongue slid into my mouth. I savored his mint taste and leaned in more.

"Ok you love birds either get a room or come watch the ball drop with us" Sebastian said. I blushed and grabbed Jace's hand leading him onto the couch.

"Now look who's flustered" Simon whispered into my ear as I snuggled into Jace. I rolled my eyes but blushed slightly. I snuggled into Jace's chest as our friends started the count down.

"10" After everything he is in jail.

"9" He won't bother us.

"8" John is getting justice.

"7" I am getting justice.

"6" Mom is getting justice.

"5" He won't harm anyone.

"4" The world is getting justice.

"3" In the weird scheme of things life will go back to normal.

"2" Yes my new years resolution is to go on that stage sing about John. Get things to go back to normal.

"1" Yes because finally after a month of grieving I am finally have closer. I am honoring his remembrance.

"WELCOME TO THE NEW YEAR NEW YORK" The man on the TV shouted.

"Welcome to a new year Clary" Jace said as he leaned his lips down to mine. I wish you were here bro but I know just between me and you are somewhere even more special.

**So This is the sencond to last Chappy. :D Finally almost done, but I am going to miss this. Anyways I hope you enjoyed the song used was Leaving Out All The Rest by Linkin' Park. Great Song! :D**


	12. Slipped Away

The spot light shined on my face and I breathed heavier. Slowly I made my way to the piano. I cleared my throat and leaned into the mic.

"Hi my names Clary Frairchild" I scanned the crowed. All the faces I loved and cared for, Jace, Izzy, Mom, dad, Alec, Magnus, Simon, Maia and a couple more were here but still missing one, John my dead brother.

"I will be singing Slipped Away by Avril Lavigne. This is dedicated to my" I paused taking a deep breathe "This is dedicated to my brother who dead a few months ago." I pushed back the piano seat and sat down.

"This ones for you big bro" I whispered taking another deep breathe.

_Na na_

_Na na na na na_

My fingers moved across the keys in an even rhythm. I gulped down my spit and opened my mouth.

_I miss you_

_I miss you so bad_

_I don't forget you_

_Oh it's so sad_

I could feel in the words were true in my heart. I do really miss John and I do really feel sad. There I sat singing what my heart felt and it felt good to just let go and let it out.

_I hope you can hear me_

_I remember it clearly_

_The day you slipped away_

_Was the day I found_

_It won't be the same_

_Oh_

Tears strung in my eyes.

_**Come on baby sis" John said holding out his hand. "It's just one haunted house nothing can harm us its fake" Hesitantly I fell for his charm and grabbed his hand. We entered the house and everything popped out. But with Jonathans hand in mine I didn't even flinch just walked away bored. Then a guy came out with a fake chainsaw and pretended to saw my brother. What I didn't know that it was fake and the blood on my brothers shirt was fake.**_

"_**John!" I cried hugging my brother. "Please don't hurt"**_

"_**It's okay Clary its fake" John said patting my head then turning to the guy. "Is this some sick joke!" Jonathan yelled a the guy. "You almost gave my baby sister a heart attack." John dragged me out.**_

"_**Are you okay?" He asked softly. I sniffed and whipped away my tears.**_

"_**Let's go get some ice cream" I smiled and looked at him.**_

"_**You know I am 12 right?" I asked. He winked and draped his arms around me.**_

"_**You're still going to always be my baby sis"**_

By know I couldn't see from my tears but I kept singing.

_Na na_

_Na na na na na_

_I didn't get around to kiss you_

_Goodbye on the hand_

_I wish that I could see you again_

_I know that I can't_

_Oh_

I will miss him always but one day I will see him. And I know he is watching me right now.

_I hope you can hear me_

_I remember it clearly_

_**I cried in my bed room as I looked at the photo of me and my ex boyfriend. I was 15 and just got cheated on by my first boyfriend. A knock sounded on my door.**_

"_**Clary you alright" My mom whispered.**_

_**I shook my head at the door. "JUST GO AWAY." I shouted "I don't want to see anybody." The door jiggled for a few minutes but she gave up. Maybe 10 minutes later I heard the jiggling again. The door opened and John strode in.**_

"_**Go away Jonathan" I put my head in the pillow. The door clicked and locked again. I felt arms around me. His hand stroked my head as I cried. I fell asleep an hour later when I woke up John was still by my side.**_

"_**Wanna tell me what's got you so upset" He asked softly. I wiped my eyes and looked up to him.**_

"_**Jordan cheated on me" I sniffled.**_

"_**Tell me about it" He said.**_

"_**Well it was our "girl's night out" So Maia, Julies, Christina, and I all went to the movie theater." I sniffled. "Well we sat in the back where nobody saw us we enjoyed the whole movie"**_

"_**What happened next" John asked.**_

"_**When the lights came on I saw that a few rows ahead that Jordan and Lizzy my old best friend kissing" I sighed "I ran out of there while the girls chewed him out" John tucked me in. He kissed my forehead and turned off the lights.**_

"_**I will be back soon" He whispered.**_

"_**Where are you going" I asked.**_

"_**I am going to have a little "talk" to Jordan about messing with my little sister's heart" he winked and left.**_

_The day you slipped away_

_Was the day I found_

_It won't be the same_

_Oh_

_I've had my wake up_

_Won't you wake up_

_I keep asking why_

_I can't take it_

_It wasn't fake_

_It happened you passed by_

"_**5, 6, 7, 8" I counted as I stepped in the music, or tried to. I spun and landed on my butt. I rubbed it but got up and continued. I threw up a kick and spun. Then I added jumps. I danced till I was tired then sat on my bed.**_

"_**This is so going on you tube" I heard a voice murmur.**_

"_**JOHN!" I shrieked throwing my already open door more open. "Give me that" I shouted. There was some embarrassing stuff on that tape. **_

"_**Nope" He said popping the "P." We ran around the house till finally I got the upper hand and jumped on him.**_

"_**Give it" I said as manically as a 14 year old could be. He leaned in and tried to lick me.**_

"_**Ew!" I shouted instantly jumping away. He laughed and went up to his room, and into my misery. **_

I closed my eyes and swayed my fingers flowing the beat.

_Now you're gone_

_Now you're gone_

_There you go_

_There you go_

_Somewhere I can't bring you back_

_Now you're gone_

_Now you're gone_

_There you go_

_There you go_

_Somewhere you're not coming back_

I was a wreck by this point either through my voice came out strong and emotional.

_The day you slipped away_

_Was the day I found_

_It won't be the same no..._

_**10 seconds left. Home tigers: 38, Away Angels: 38. Number 4 steals the ball and brings it down to the hoop.**_

"_**10, 9, 8" The crowd starts counting down.**_

"_**7, 6" Number 4 misses the shot and number 12 steals it back.**_

"_**5, 4, 3" Number 12 throws from half court. The crowd stands on there feet. The ball travels all the way down and… NUMBER 12 MAKES IT. I turn to my mom.**_

"_**Did you see that John made it they won!" I cried hugging my mom. The Angels were chest bumping, half-fiving and hugging each other. John ran up the stairs to us and hugged my mom spinning her around.**_

"_**We go to nationals" He cried. I smiled as he hugged me next.**_

"_**Way to go Bro" I said.**_

"_**Let's go home" Jocelyn said.**_

"_**This day just keep getting better and better." John said.**_

_The day you slipped away_

_Was the day that I found_

_It won't be the same oh..._

_Na na_

_Na na na na na_

_I miss you_

I stood up as the crowd clapped booming like thunder. I bowed and looked at the crowds faces mostly everyone was crying or trying not to.

"Are you proud of me big brother" I asked the ceiling quietly. I felt his presence the warm feeling bursting into my heart. And I knew, knew that I had finally accepted his death and can move on with my life with him in my heart.

_**Finally the last chapter! It has been a pleasure folks it truly has. I hope you enjoyed it. Yes it was very depressing but it did have a happy ending and I am all for theses! The song used for today was slipped Away By Avril Lavigne. Thanks soooooo much as always for reviewing, and I would like to dedicate this chapter to these people:**_

**jadelyn3352 **

**hawaiiangrl **

**penguincrazy **

**TheaGray **

**Turtle**

**Taylor Jade **

**Anonymous1997**

**coolicetwilight **

**WOOPWOOP**

**morta instruments fan66**

**Jace'sclarywithbrownhair **

**JaceLover4eva **

**Fallen Angel211 **

**Ezzy xox **

**monica**

**isabelle-berliner **

**ContagiousChemistry14 **

**mounika0329 **

**KSD1 **

**Lightwood and Fray**

**katie**

**MortalEnemies1234 **

**xogirlygirl97 **

**mosaicmaker **

**Blond lover**

**An nie**

**team jace**

xxwolfybabyxx

**CoolestxNerd **

**enilorac**

**MortalFire101**

**loving ya **

_**So these are all the awesome people! Love you guys! Please please please go check out there stories if you haven't, they are really good peoples. Anyways another thing is I want to thank my bestie, Abigail For being there and supporting me please go check out her stories. It's on Wattpad, it's called Dancing in the rain and it's by AbigailJane! Thanks tons! :D **_

_**(Soundtrack for How Could This Happen To Me)_Okay and finally all the songs used:**_

_**1: Untitled by Simple Plan**_

_**2: Run By (Snow Patrol) Leona Lewis**_

_**3: A Million Raindrops by ****Bebo Norman.**_

_**4: Thinking of You by Katy Perry**_

_**5: Pale by Within Temptation**_

_**6: Good Enough by Evanescence**_

_**7: Fearless by Taylor Swift**_

_**8: Every time by ****Brittany**** Spears**_

_**9: When I am Gone by Eminem**_

_**10: Like a toy Solider by Eminem**_

_**11: Perfect by Pink**_

_**12: Leave out All the Rest by ****Linkin****Park**_

_**Bonus tracks:**_

_**13: A Moment Like This by Kelly Clarkson**_

_**14: ****Iridescent**** by Linkin Park**_

_**15: Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol**_

_**16: Dynamite Taio Cruz**_

_**17: If I Die Young by The Band Perry**_

_**18: Perfect World by Simple Plan**_

_**19: Live like Your Dying by Lenka**_

_**20: Trouble is a Friend by Lenka**_


	13. IMPORTANT!

Okay so I know it's been a long time but here I am back and this time I'm think: (Drum Roll) A SEQUEL! So how about it I'll give you a preview and tell me if you think I should continue.

After a horrible accident, causing her to loose her brother, Clary Fray is finally coming to terms over the fact that her brother is never coming back. But what if a small incident occurs bringing everything to the surface. Weird things start happing and this causes a strain on her and Jace's relationship. Will she ever be truly okay?

**My Shadow**

"So how was your day at college" Jace ask me one hand on the steering wheel the other on my thigh. I nodded my head in acknowledgment and shrugged my shoulders.

"It was okay you know the professor really got me thinking about what I want to do with my life" I said

"Well whatever it is you know I'll be there." I turned my head toward him and flashed a grin.

"Okay well I applied for a job somewhere I'm dropping school and becoming an exotic dancer"

Jace shot me a look and turned his attention on the road but put a possessive arm around me. He let out a small growl.

"I am the only one who gets to look at you in that way, but you know later you could you know give me a private dance" He gave me a suggestive smirk. I rolled my eyes and looked out the window.

"Yeah right Jace you know what I said waiting till marriage" I didn't have to turn to know he was pouting at me.

"Anyways-"He got cut off when a car flew past us not stopping at the stoop light. Jace slammed on the breaks. Jace hit his fist on the horn.

"Holy- Mother-"Jace strung out curses but my head was somewhere else.

I closed my eyes taking deep breaths. _Red, blue, loud wailing._ I shuddered cringing in my skin.

_Blood I remember blood everywhere. _

My breaths shortened and my chest tightened.

_Shouts of people. Thunder._

Tears felt trapped in my eyes and I tried not to let one drop.

"_Honey can you hear me" An unfamiliar voice asked._

"Clary!"

_"Mom is she" Another voice similar to the first said._ My breath cut off for a second.

"Clary!" Again an agitate voice.

_"No I can feel her pulse" The voice whispered_

"Clary!"

"_Clary can you hear me" The voice whispered again._

"CLARY!" I was shook back to reality. Jace's face focused into my view.

"Are you okay honey" Jace asked worriedly brushing hair off my face. I shook my head clearing my thoughts. I realized it was daylight out and the car was perfectly fine parked on the side of the road. I jumped when I heard a car honk. I looked behind me just to see people waving at another car.

"Are you okay" Jace asked again. My attention was averted back to him.

"Yeah I'm fine" He gave me an analyzing look and shook his head then reached for my hand. He started the car and squeezed my hand. I looked out the window and finally let one tear fall.

'What was that' I asked myself in my head before I drifted off to sleep.


End file.
